Part Dos
The first test drive down to Portland, Maine showed me that the car was horribly out of alignment, I'd let go of the wheel for a few seconds and I'd find myself right in the ditch. Also noticed that at certain speeds the whole car would rumble and shutter like an alcoholic pouring sugar in his coffee in the late morning, but only at certain speeds; 35, 55 and 68 mph. I'm sure there is some deeper synergistic meaning of these speeds that brings about this strange unpleasant vibration. Maybe they fall along the Fibonacci sequence and hits a frequency that makes the metal wants to explode its molecules in all directions. Who really knows besides the Germans (those overly intelligent bastards). After several hundred dollars for new tires and a tierod, I was on my way south. The car still shuttered at certain speeds, I am just gonna have to learn to live with it, we have to find compromises if we're to spend the next 3,000 miles together.
I drove wonderfully out of the way to western Mass to see my old friend Travis in the town of Springfield. I asked if it was the same town where they "filmed" the Simpsons but he said no, and I didn't see the Kwik-E-Mart......who needs the Kwik-E-Mart anyway? In the morning the car gave me some trouble starting, but nothing that a little cold-winded swearing and carb started wouldn't help. On the country roads down through Connecticut I was filled with a great sense of excitement, heading into NYC, having the whole country ahead of me. This massive freedom became present, the realization that I could go anywhere, be anyone, having no obligations or real direction, with the wheel of life in my hands I couldn't help but smile. The changing color of the leaves took on a bright glow, like a fall colored northern lights along the highway, changing and melting into beautiful purples, rusted orange and magnificent yellow that makes the brightest highlighter look dull in comparison. I had a hard time keeping my eyes on the road; I let them wander through the psychedelic display of foliage, it was as if God melted boxes of crayons through the forest.
As I neared closer and closer to New York, the traffic became hectic, and more "hecticer", I had to give my full attention to the quick whipping cars merging and mixing all around me. Everyone was in flashy, shinny new BMWs or huge black Escalades all driving twice as fast as I was. I felt like an old slow gypsy totally out of place in this new modern fast paced society. The lanes quadrupled before my eyes and the industrial-ness of the world started to take over, the beautiful foliage was gone, my nerves were on edge and both hands tight against the wheel. I became envious of the slow life style of nomadic Mongolians for some reason. You lucky bastards, I thought to myself, how beautiful it would be to know nothing of these over populated smog- pocked cities, these fuel hungry vehicles with speed as the only game in town. I was being boxed in by three huge tractor trailer trucks, dwarfing my little vintage Mercedes, as I pleaded out loud "A horse! A horse! My Kingdom for a horse!"
I pulled in hot and heavy into the depths of Brooklyn, blaring some old school hip hop, figured "When in Rome", right? I quick spitted every word of Notorious B.I.G like a boss, like I owned that city, like I was born in the Bronx slinging crack to raise my daughter, slouched down in my chair at a low angle, one arm steering my casual course, tipping my hat to every bad mama-jamma that I passed. I felt pumped up! The pulse of the city started creeping its way into my nerves, and I let it. And to my unexpected disgust, within 24 hours I had gotten two parking tickets, each for $115! Can you believe that? A fire hydrant that doesn't even work was responsible, wasn't my fault. After the first ticket, I just moved back a little bit, but I think they just moved the hydrant closer to my car in the middle of the night, and lo and behold -- I had another ticket in the morning. I drove outta that city faster than a white guy in Brooklyn blaring rap music all puffed up thinking he's some hot shit, all cocky and stupidly naïve. And after getting horribly lost in downtown Manhattan on my way to New Jersey, the rain obscuring every minimal view I had, my wipers doing a worthless job of getting that liquid shit off my windshield, I was on the edge of frustration....well actually I was neck deep in frustration. I turned off my music, and quietly mumbled to myself, "I'm not worthy, I'm not worthy, I'm not worthy". Pueo was laughing his silly little owl chuckle the whole entire time.
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